So, it happened. On February 12, I turned 30. There were so many mixed emotions leading up to this day, that it took me a few days to sit down and write this post. I had so many things I wanted to say or explain and I can sum it up with one line:
We talk too much.
There were so many goals I wanted to have accomplished by 30. I’ve probably voiced a few of them in past blogs, but the specifics aren’t the important thing right now. The point is most of them didn’t get accomplished.
I was excited about turning 30. Like some magical switch would make me grow up and handle the things I keep saying I’ll do but I’ve been putting off. But the truth is, nothing changed at midnight that would make me accomplish anything.
It was all mental.
30 is like Monday. “I’ll start this diet Monday.” “I’ll work on my business Monday.” “I’ll start my book Monday.”
We use Mondays and milestone birthdays as excuses so much that it has become normal. As cliche as it is, tomorrow really isn’t promised. Why do we keep putting things off and get mad when we don’t accomplish the things we wanted?
And there lied my main problem with turning 30: I didn’t do enough in my 20s. I’m in debt. I have no savings. There are so many things that Facebook Memories reminded me that I set out to do and didn’t even scratched the surface…
A few months ago, I decided this blog would be my road to recovery. I would capture my journey and hope that my testimonies would help someone else. But now, its February 2017 and 30 is here.
I needed more time to fix this.
“Thanking God for all my setbacks. Cause He the reason I’m able to get back,” – Big Sean
God has a way of smacking you in the face like those old V8 commercials. I have a lot to be proud of. I have two Masters degrees. I have several streams of income. I have a lot going on for myself. And I don’t say this to gas my own head up. I say it because we have to remind ourselves of what we have done, otherwise that sneaky little emotion called self-doubt creeps in and makes us believe we are failures.
If you are reaching a milestone birthday and are having a mild panic attack, here are four tips on how to bounce back and be great.
Recap your accomplishments
You are a boss! You are worth it. You are enough. Even if you feel like you haven’t accomplished a lot, there is someone praying for your life. There is someone who has so much less going on and is watching you and thinking you are living the dream. There is someone aspiring to be a strong as you, as pretty as you, as resilient as you. So don’t hold yourself down. Let yourself be great!
Set realistic goals
Now, you may have accomplished some things, but if your heart is still pumping blood that means you still have some work to do. Be realistic about what you have accomplished and what you haven’t been able to do. Think about why you failed at a specific thing. Pray about whether God wanted you to go in that direction and if its something you still want. Once that goal is established, think outside the box and take a different approach than last time. Don’t be insane and expect old ways to get to new goals.
Be unapologetic in your growth
Stop living for other people. Just stop. Everyone is out here doing their own thing. Most of the time, they are not worried about you or your feelings at all. This isn’t a bad thing. Sometimes you have to think about how your decisions effect others that depend on you, but if you don’t…do you! People will not apologize for doing what’s right for them, even if it hurts you. So own your growth and give no apologies for it.
The gift of life is one I will never take lightly. There are so many televised deaths that we’ve become desensitized, but I will always and forever thank God for life. Celebrate your milestones. Laugh and love. Be amazing. Smile and be grateful.