I’ve dealt with this pain in my big toe on my left foot for a few years now. It started out with just an ache when I wore heels and gradually got worse. Last year, it got to the point where I could not even stand up in a heel or wedge. This year, it worsen to the point where I couldn’t do certain exercises and even hurt with flat shoes on.
I had tried cortisone shots, but was tired of just numbing the pain and decided to proceed with corrective surgery. I had the surgery last Wednesday and have been on bed rest since.
When I tell you that I haven’t done anything, that’s what it felt like. Although I did finish up two editing projects, I felt like all I’d done the past seven days was eat, take pain meds, and sleep. I did go to a funeral of a close family friend, but after that emotionally draining experience, I was back in bed, eating, taking pain meds, and sleeping.
I figured I would only be off from my full-time job for a week, but I found out that wasn’t the case and kind of freaked out. Last night, I decided not to waste my time off.
I looked at my 2018 goals and realized that I wasn’t being very productive at all. I had things that I could still work on while recovering from surgery. Books to read, novels to write, blogs to post, etc. None of that required me to move, but it would cause me to be productive.
I finished reading my first book this year (review of The Hollywood Commandments coming soon). It helped light a fire under me that I had let waste away. We all get distracted and I could use my current injury to sit and do nothing, but that would not benefit me in anyway.
When people say you have to change your mindset to change your situation, it’s not just because it sounds good. This is the absolute truth.
It’s been over a month since my surgery now. My scar is fading and I’m able to flex and work my foot. It is still sore, but I’m excited about having gotten it fixed.
I have to make a conscious effort to get up and move. I have to make an effort to change my habits after being stationary for so long. I listened to a sermon that said, “Just because you’ve gotten used to it, doesn’t mean it’s God’s will for you life.” That one line hit me so hard. We are so used to our comfort zones that we don’t realize most of them are never where God intended us to be.
We like to say nothing comes easy, but creating new habits is. We have to get over our laziness and excuses and just do it. Stop looking at the overwhelming goal and build habits that will eventually get you there. Once your habits become patterns, you won’t even realize you’re doing the actual work anymore.
That’s where I want to be. I want my good habits to be things I don’t even question or have to talk myself into anymore. The only one who will make that happen is me (and God of course). I’m the deciding factor. God is waiting on me to move.
My mind is strong enough to defeat my laziness. My mind is strong enough to defeat my procrastination. My mind is strong enough to resist anything that is not beneficial to God’s will for my life.
What are you struggling? Make a decision to declare victory over it. Even if that victory seems far off. The first thing you have to do is think it. The victory will come.
Happy recovering, loves!