10 Lessons Learned

In 2010, I was a recently published 23 year old, full of goals, aspirations and positivity. I was in a relationship with a guy that I was sure was the one. I had just graduated with my bachelors in a corporate communications and ready for grad school.

Today, on the last day of the decade, I am faced with many challenges and decisions to make on my next move. I’m 7 books in now. I’ve added multiple titles to my resume and man let me tell you…I’ve learned a lot!

Outside of expanding my business to include editing for others and this blog as a platform to help heal through writing about my own thoughts and experiences, personally..this decade has been a lot. 10 years ago, I had a plan on what my life would look like going into 2020. The marriage, the kids, the home, the major success I imagined at 23…none of it happened. I could be bitter about my dreams not going as planned, but I choose to be grateful for what has manifested in my life. I’ve had a lot of wins and a lot of lessons. Being able to reflect on these and grow into the next phase is a whole other reason to be grateful.

Here are 10 major lessons I’ve learned this decade.

Everything isn’t about me

A lot of times. This lesson right here eases all of my anxiety and stress. It makes me less angry when I feel I’ve been wronged. It takes away some pressure when I feel like I’m overwhelmed. Operating with this mindset has brought me plenty of peace. It wasn’t always like this. I thought someone was always looking at me wrong, thinking about me wrong, talking about me, etc. growing up. Living that way is torture. Just mad for no reason LOL.

Some relationships are temporary and that isn’t always a bad thing

Self-explanatory. Even the ones you think are forever may not be. I’ve ended relationships and friendships this decade that I was sure weren’t going anywhere. Look at me…still alive.

Making more money won’t solve the problem 

Because if you can’t manage the little you have, you can’t manage the surplus.

My way isn’t always the best way 

Be patient with me on this lesson…

I can’t change a man

And I refuse to try AGAIN! I refuse!

What others think of me isn’t my concern

In the powerful words of Drake, “How long they choose to love you will never be your decision.”

I must protect my peace at all costs 

From anything and anyone…including myself.

Scared money won’t make money

Taking risks in business may not always work out, but when they do…*queue praise break*

Good people aren’t always my people 

Vibes don’t lie, whether they are a good person or not doesn’t mean they fit into my tribe and vice versa. Don’t feel bad about standing on this decision.

God really is everything 

Because breathing and being able to write and help others write has been a God given gift that I am forever grateful for. Because He has spared my life so many times! (literally…I fall asleep driving sometimes). Because He has blessed my family tremendously. Because I no longer have ANY family members that are incarcerated…I can go on, but you get the point.

I am looking forward to many more lessons and victories in the next decade, God willing. Although I had other plans for my life, I can truly say I am grateful for all that I have been blessed with. I do not take lightly the fact that most of my family is still breathing, including two of my elders who are a decade or two from having been on this side of heaven for a century. 

What’s a major lesson you’ve learned this decade?

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